“We are called to be strong companions and clear mirrors to one another, to seek those who reflect with compassion and a keen eye how we are doing, whether we seem centered or off course . . . we need the nourishing company of others to create the circle needed for growth, freedom, and healing.”
The above statement from writer Wayne Muller points to a simple fact: it’s human nature to seek belonging—to find those people who share commonalities or possess the traits we aspire to adapt. Whether it’s a family, community, spiritual mentor, or friends, the people in our tribe are vital because they reflect our values and our God-inspired need for companionship.
Our tribe mirrors back to us who we are. They inspire us to grow. Sometimes their honesty is hard to take when they point out our shortcomings, but in doing so they help us become the best version of ourselves. They provide us with love and encouragement.
In my Finding Flow book, I devote four chapters to the different ways we can find our tribe.
I’ve also developed an exercise called, “Who’s in your Circle of Trust?”
I invite you to have fun with the free exercise by clicking here.
When you take stock of who’s in your Inner Circle of Trust, you might step back and be filled with gratitude for those who bless your life. You can also determine who might be missing or need to be moved outside of your inner circle.
By taking the Inner Circle of Trust exercise, you’ll be able to focus on the following members of your unique community, all of whom are important in surrounding yourself with a life-giving tribe.
Your Inner Circle of Trust
Who are the handful of people God has placed in your Inner Circle—those who nudge you to grow in spirit, mind, and body? It might include your significant other, family members, church, and/or spiritual friends. It might also include someone who “appeared” in your life just when you needed them.
Who is your teacher? Who inspires and graces you with deeper understanding and wisdom? It might be a public speaker, a spiritual director, a writer whose books inspire you with new insights, a hero, a saint, or a relative. Who do you look to as a source of on-going spiritual wisdom for your life?
Where do you place God in your Inner Circle of Trust? How does the Divine fit into your circle of trust?
Toxic People or Things
Is there anyone or anything you feel the God-nudge to move out of your inner circle of trust? Someone or something with a negative influence on your life?
MIA (Missing In Action)
As the seasons of our lives change, we need to replace those who are no longer available to us due to aging, death, life changes, etc. Is there anything or anyone missing from your community? If so, who or what?
After you’ve completed your Circle of Trust exercise, consider doing this:
- Sit with God in quiet.
- Review your Circle of Trust.
- Give thanks for those the Creator has placed in your Community.
- Pray about and distance yourself from the toxic people or things in your life.
- Discern who or what is missing.
- Ask yourself, who would place me in their Inner Circle of Trust? Who do I inspire?
- Ask God to lead you to those you would like to add to your spiritual community.
- Take a risk—seek, find, and embrace those you desire to form your Inner Circle of Trust.
It takes prayer, searching, and quiet reflection to create the community of trusted loved ones, friends, and spiritual advisors with whom God wishes to bless you. The effort is well worth it. You are worth it.
When you find those individuals who gift your life, give thanks—you’re finding your Tribe. You’re finding flow!
—brian j plachta
September Workshop—In-Person and Via Zoom
Finding Flow – A Field Guide to Discover Inner Peace, Balance, and Wholeness
September 13 @ 7:00 pm – 8:30 pm at the Catholic Information Center
What does inner peace look like to you? How do you feel when you experience wholeness? Unpack these questions and discover a field guide for making a personal spiritual journey to your inner self and God. Learn four ancient practices that spiritual teachers incorporated into their lives to live in the Divine Flow. Presented by Brian Plachta, spiritual mentor, and author of Finding Flow – Spiritual Practices to Reclaim Inner Peace, Balance, and Wholeness (Paulist Press).